The Downside of Trying to Be an ADHD Super Mom

Being a mom is hard work. But it is especially challenging if you have ADHD. You have to plan, prioritize, organize and manage your time, your kids, your household and relationships – all of which ADHD makes much more difficult. Add to this the estrogen factor which is known to exacerbate the symptoms of ADHD. On top of that, there can the negative self-talk and low esteem that often begins for young women with ADHD during adolescence. And finally, many of your adult peers, including your spouse, many not understand that ADHD is not just a childhood condition, and don’t understand why you feel and act the way you do.

All of this can leave you feeling stressed out, fatigued, and isolated. Dr. Ellen Littman, a clinical psychologist who specializes in attention deficit disorder (ADHD or ADD) has some advice. 

• Acknowledge your ADHD and that you need help – ADHD is serious and impacts you and your family. Don’t blame yourself for having symptoms of this neurological condition that are beyond your control. Instead, acknowledge what is and seek help.
• Get treatment – There are a wide range of treatment options including medication, therapy, coaching and support groups. Exercise and nutrition can also help with your symptoms. The key is to get started and get help.
• Enlist help from those close to you – Talk to those closest to you about your ADHD and how it impacts you. It’s alright to be vulnerable and ask for their help. But you don’t need to apologize for your ADHD.
• Let your children help you – Let them help you come up with solutions to the everyday problems that occur in family life.They will be more invested in following the rules, if they helped create them.
• Take time for yourself – Schedule time for yourself each day, even if it’s only 10 or 15 minutes. Putting it on your calendar is important to ensure it really happens. You can decide what you want to do with the time you schedule for yourself. This is your time.
• Don’t be afraid to say no – Social engagements, volunteering, and other events can become overwhelming when you have ADHD. Know your own limits when it comes to these types of activities or obligations and don’t be afraid to say no.

You don’t have to be Super Mom or try to live up to some impossible feminine ideal. You can live the life that is right for you and your family, and fully enjoy the experience of motherhood, even with ADHD.