When Perfect Gets in the Way: ADHD, Procrastination, and Letting Go

If you have ADHD, you might be all too familiar with the pressure to “get it right.”

Maybe you spend hours rewriting an email that should’ve taken ten minutes. Or you avoid starting a project because the idea of doing it perfectly feels overwhelming. If that sounds familiar, you’re not alone. Perfectionism often works against your goals, especially if you have ADHD.

Why Perfectionism Can Be a Problem When You Have ADHD

Perfectionism might seem like a good thing at first. After all, striving to do your best sounds admirable. But when you have ADHD, perfectionism can quickly become a roadblock. That inner voice telling you to wait until everything is just right can delay action, increase anxiety, and drain your energy. You may already struggle with organization, working memory, or task-switching (the ability to shift your attention smoothly from one task to another). Add perfectionism into the mix, and it can create a paralyzing cycle that keeps you stuck.

Perfectionism and procrastination often go hand in hand. You might put things off not because you’re lazy or uninterested, but because the pressure to do it perfectly is just too much. So instead of starting, you delay. You tell yourself you’ll begin when you have more time, more energy, or a clearer plan. The task builds up in your mind until it feels impossible to tackle. Eventually, that looming project becomes a source of shame, reinforcing the cycle. For those with ADHD, this pattern can be especially demoralizing, as it taps into long-standing struggles with motivation and follow-through.

Perfectionism may also be a type of compensation. Individuals with ADHD may strive for perfection as a way to avoid criticism, control outcomes, and compensate for executive function challenges. It can also be a way of dealing with anxiety. Perfectionism can be a way to manage anxiety, particularly anxiety related to performance, criticism, and mistakes. And perfectionism often involves negative self-judgment and a tendency to compare oneself to others.

Signs That Perfectionism Might Be Getting in Your Way

Perfectionism isn’t always easy to spot. It can show up in sneaky ways, like:

• Avoiding tasks unless you feel 100% ready
• Over-researching before starting anything
• Being hypercritical of your own work
• Struggling to finish things because they’re “not quite good enough”
• Feeling like a failure if something doesn’t go exactly as planned

These behaviors are often rationalized or overlooked, making it harder to recognize the perfectionism behind them. If any of these ring true, it’s worth taking a closer look at how perfectionism might be affecting you.

How to Become Aware of Perfectionism and Keep It in Check

Below are some strategies to help you manage perfectionism:

1. Name It When You See It
   Start noticing when your perfectionism shows up. Is it when you’re about to start something new? When you’re working on a deadline? The more you can identify the pattern, the easier it is to interrupt it.
2. Redefine Success
   Try shifting your mindset from “perfect” to “progress.” Done is often better than perfect. Set a realistic standard for what “good enough” looks like and let that be your goal.
3. Break It Down
   Big, abstract tasks feed perfectionism. Break projects into small, specific steps so you can focus on what’s in front of you instead of getting overwhelmed by the big picture.
4. Give Yourself Permission to Be Imperfect
   Remind yourself that mistakes are part of learning. In fact, your brain grows through trial and error. Try viewing imperfect action as a sign of bravery, not failure.
5. Practice Self-Compassion
   You’re doing the best you can with the brain you have. Treat yourself with the same kindness you’d offer a friend who was struggling.

Perfectionism doesn’t have to run the show. With some awareness and self-compassion, you can learn to let go of the pressure to be flawless and focus instead on making steady, meaningful progress. Choose one small task today that you can complete imperfectly—and notice how that small win feels. That’s where real success begins.

References

1. https://add.org/adhd-and-perfectionism/
2. https://www.additudemag.com/perfectionism-adhd-not-good-enough-anxiety/
3. https://www.verywellmind.com/perfectionism-adhd-symptom-5496248
4. https://www.understood.org/en/articles/adhd-and-perfectionism
5. https://www.healthline.com/health/adhd/adhd-and-perfectionism

Share on Social Media